Babies don't cry for the same reasons adults cry. Crying is like talking to babies. They are not traumatized/sad/scared (or any other negative emotion) most of the time. They're just saying things. "There's a window! I have eyes! What are colors? Blankets!"
Also, when my midwife told me to try to stop expecting specific things and just let things be for the most part.
Everything is a phase and it too shall pass. That doesn't have to be bad but how they nap or eat or play at 1 month is not the same as 3 or 6 months nd you just have to keep adjusting and going along with them.
You'll feel like you're a bad mom if you can't magically make him stop crying.
The fact that you're trying to get him to stop and care is enough. If you've hit your limit, lay him somewhere safe and take a couple of minutes for yourself. If someone else offers to watch baby so you can nap, there is nothing wrong with using ear plugs to get a nap.
"Enjoy the moments you can" Even when you're horrifically sleep deprived, you haven't eaten or showered.
Give them time to play alone. Really watch what they are doing. Newborns don't really do anything, but it's amazing how they progress, and it's so easy to miss when you are always entertaining them.
On the mental health side:
- spend at least 10 minutes outside, in sunlight. Early morning is best, but sunlight.
- spend 10-20 minutes where you aren't responsible for the baby. This can be combined with the above.
- shower and brush your teeth. Eat good protein and meals.
- arrange your schedule to get at least a 4 hour chunk of sleep.
- If you think you need mental help, get it early. Better yet, arrange for it before the birth. If I didn't have my psychiatrist and therapist lined up, they would not have let me leave the hospital (depression.)